Small Favors

Right now I am listening to the sound of our sweet baby snoring. He's slept pretty peacefully for about 4 hours, on and off this afternoon. When he is awake, he is pretty content, (unless the pacifier falls out ;-) and his sleep seems to be deeper than usual this afternoon.

I love watching him sleep, listening to him snore, watching him jump (you know, when they just seem to get startled for no apparent reason and their arms fly up and then slowly fall down again). He sleeps with a pacifier in most of the time now and I love watching him sleep and then suck for a second, without waking up. I am going to go out for a walk. I am in my walking clothes, shoes on, stroller ready and then I just got stuck watching him for a minute. There is always so much to do and I could go run and do something, but how long will I have to watch him?? How long before he sleeps so little I only have a morning nap to do a few things, and how long before he won't sleep with the pacifier and how long before there is someone else to take care of??

Sometimes I catch myself looking at some outfit or something that someone has given us for 3-6 months or 12 months and I think "I can't wait to see him in this...I wish he was 3 months old now!!" or, "I wish he would smile at me now." or "how fun would it be watching him crawl, walk, talk, etc." I have to take a minute and remind myself that this is a beautiful time....right now and soon, all too soon, I will be wanting this time back. I can't wait until the first time he says "Mama" or he smiles at me, but right now, this minute, I am so glad just to listen to him snore. And I know that one day he will wake up and give me that big gummy grin that I see in his sleep!!